Many thoughts…
[Warning: Long and personal post]
I usually go through this crazy thinking twirl before I could finally doze off and these thoughts vary, sometimes scary and worrying me others are delightful ones which set me off into sweet dreams – not lately!
Thought one: Blog obsession! Yeah believe it or not, you leave a post and wonder: “What will people think?” – “How will your thoughts or personality be interpreted?” – “What do I wanna blog about next day?” – “What good is the blog for?”; That lead me to something else which many bloggers tapped on; Blogger’s identity. Do we as anonymous people (to each other I mean) benefit each other? Or does it sometimes create unnecessary animosity? “Does staying anonymous help in expressing ones self or is it the mere feeling of thrill you get when you can write about whatever you want without boundaries?” “Is it a protection against evil dirty people?”. “What happens if your identity’s revealed?” “Is it upsetting or should you be worried that someone you know is watching every single word, waiting for you to slip or simply misunderstand what you write and how you think and beats up the bush on that?” Many bloggers rather stay “behind the scenes” while others last concern is worrying about people’s reactions and own thoughts. I wonder..
Thought two: Have you noticed how similar the days are? I posted on this earlier but it is amazing how this is a killer routine it’s turning out to be. I thought, well if one had a hobby or filled the time with important things then maybe there won’t be this void thus the change and stimulation, not sitting like dodos (not you Dodo :P). Change is from inside and you and I along with every single person control our lives n’ time and make’em as fun or dull as we want. It is strange how kill the time with nonsense when we don’t even know when or how our lives will end… Death’s unexpected, death can sometimes be brutal or merciful… Death’s around us waiting for our last grain in our “hourglass” to drop to pick the amana that Allah had given to us.. what will it be like??
Thought three: How nasty, immoral, filthy some people can be! Some A-holes out there think there are smartasses when they use bad lingo or probably think they are cooooool when they address people in such low and cheap ways. For those of you out there leaving comments as low as your mentality is; refrain for the freggin’ simple reason of respecting yourselves before even thinking of how others will feel. No wonder why some people think that blogging is like chatting in a way, another method of hooking up with new guys / girls. This sux! Oh, BTW- you dumb head, does RIPE ring a bell!?
Thought four: Age, marriage, kids & a family; Things that run through my head especially if I’m reminded in some way of… not in our hands, that’s life and it is all from Allah
Thought five: Again, nasty people but who intentionally hurt and mentally abuse me… One only gets to one conclusion: “To hell!”; I ain’t spending my life like mama Theresa, caring and being so damn sensitive to everything and one around me! One thinks: “Who the hell cares about ME?!” This sux too!
September 3rd, 2006 at
Going into this cycle of thinking leads into one thing, something keeping you worried, if it about people that is caring and you think they are insulting and humiliating a long the time you’re wrong. Who cares and love you and and and….. who hurt when he/she see you going in the wrong path or in away you see things right and it’s wrong in point of view and it’s differ. Dear life has an ending and no other way to run from it. It’s written and everyone has a day as imam-ali salam allah 3laih sayed
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Enduring, As quraan mentioned it’s the key and opens thousand and more doors of merciful and (faraj) even it recruit ppl essence for more spiritual and (zoohd)
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Self recruit : ?? ?????? ????? ???? ???? ???? ??????? ??????? (???? ????? ???? ?????? ??? ????? ??)
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As for me
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September 3rd, 2006 at
Dado welcome back here :)
That’s pretty long, i will read it beltafseel o reply later…
September 3rd, 2006 at
i really think that if you over analyze your life then you will always feel frustrated. i try not to worry too much over things and just take it one day at a time… i find that it helps you to stay happy and focused… as for the jerks that say bad things! tell me about it! some people can be so rude!
September 3rd, 2006 at
thought 1:blogging is a plus, anonymous identity is a security, i had my identity blown more than once, and i kept jumping from one blog to another, starting over, and the two blogs i had before were extremely precious, this blog i have now is still me, but concentrating on the different more productive side, blogging is to learn and teach, to enjoy and have stimulating internet sessions.
thought 2:i have thought of this today, will i spend the rest of my life with the current routine? no! things happen without u knowing, do not count on events to perform their change on u, it is ur response to them that makes the change. learning a new thing every day is a happy thought to know its definitely not the same day.
thought 3: Language had to have a dirty side for a reason .. ignore and move away.
thought 4: i promise u that u will long for the single life, so while ur in it, celebrate it hugely, the voids u need such as becoming a parent can be filled with nephews and nieces or volunteer in a nursery. as for having a partner, you can seek ur partner ur self, ur rules, ur choice.
thought 5: abusive people alot! thank god u r not abusing any one ok? and there is always someone caring for u, the people who brought u to this world.
i didn’t intend it a long comment :)
September 4th, 2006 at
Ok Dado, I will cut this into paragraphs and reply:
You know how I am and how I get preoccupied with every single thing around me but yes something is worrying me… you outta know.
People going in wrong paths; It depends on how one perceives or analyzes things and remember, not everything runs the way you want sometime truths and facts cannot be changed but one learns and appreciates and hurting to teach is not a solution, elwa3th comes bele7san :)
She3r el imam 3ali 3aleih elsalam is beautiful no one can deny but I just have to stop at one verse:
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Yes, I don’t believe that any human is pure good there has to be something wrong and we all make mistakes whether big or trivial and later on contemplate them to learn and not repeat, but you can’t spend your whole life regretting and beating up yourself because in that way, you’ll never move forward…. Am not saying it’s wrong or anything bas this is a personal view..
As for Elzohd o elsabr…. One tries bas “yama lel sabr 7dood” o we are human beings, we have to break loose sometimes.. I am trying to find a verse to replt to yours….
Izzi, one has to analyze to point mistakes and not repeat them and that surely stirs up sad emotions (mo memories like some people think bas za3al 3al nafs) , it’s like a cleansing process. Talk about these jerks! Effen rude, thank God for moderation!
September 4th, 2006 at
Bloo, that ain’t long! Bas here we go:
Thought one: False sense of security I think and I don’t think changing blogs will do the job bas yes I agree with you about the productivity part of a blog along with decent internet sessions stimulation – Dado also thinks that it should be productively used.
Thought two: Yeah, this is what I said, one does the change him / herself and trying to figure out new stuff, to learn is always good
Thought three: Yes, bas that doesn’t mean people communicating using it! Ignore, ignore, ignore.. till when? I can totally relate to these who suddenly snap, take a gun and go shooting people around!
Thought four: Hmm… Why do all married people say this!? I thought marriage IS security (if you have the right partner)… Not a cage as some think or say; bel3aks, it may be the reason for one’s development, positive change, the chance for two to build their lives as they want with their own experiences…
The problem is mafi lots of babies in the family and I fill’em up with the cats I have! As for the partner, it is difficult to find someone that will love and be loved back according to your own set of rules and personality; There has to be give n’ take and compromising from both parties…
Thought five: Emotional abuse is so bad, the wounds it leaves is so deep.. I abuse someone?! Someone will defiantly nod heads for this phrase but I want to say (something must be hurting the one who is hurting you to do so) understand… elensan won’t go around with an attitude for no reason.. Yes you are true; My poor parents I love them so much :)